Crypto Confessions

We call it Hey Anon — a series dedicated to the traders, lurkers, builders, and bag-holders who’ve seen some sh*t... and lived to post about it. This is crypto’s confessional booth.Sometimes heartfelt. Sometimes unhinged. Always human.

“I went from broke to millionaire in 7 years” — and still sleep on a mattress on the floor.

Call it the monk mode bull run. One anon got in early — 2016 ETH-under-five-bucks early. Held through every pump. Didn’t flinch in 2017. Didn’t cash out in 2020. By 2021, they were sitting on $2M.And yet? No flex. No car. No Rolex. Just a mattress on the floor and trust issues with fiat.“I don’t trust it. The money doesn’t feel real.” This is the tale of a digital minimalist in a world of leveraged Lambo dreams. Turns out, financial freedom hits different when you’ve stared down multiple cycles and still flinch at Coinbase login screens.

"I wiped out my sister's savings by convincing her to buy DOGE."

This one hurts. A Reddit anon shares how, during the 2021 mania, they hyped DOGE to their sister — convinced it was headed to the moon.She dropped her entire $6K emergency fund.Right before SNL. You already know how this ends. By July? $1,200 left.They haven’t spoken since.“I wish I could undo it. But there’s no undo button in crypto. Just blockchains and regrets.” It’s not just a story about bad timing — it’s about the weight of influence, the pressure to be the crypto guy, and what happens when your advice stops being a meme and starts costing someone everything.

"They saved my life during the bear market."

Not all bear market stories end in broken wallets. One anon opened up about facing depression during the 2022 crash — savings gone, disconnected from family, mentally underwater.Then something unexpected: a Discord server from the 2021 bull run came back to life. Not to shill, not to speculate, but to check in. Daily calls. Voice notes. Dumb memes. Real care.“I don’t know how many of them were real people… but the love was real.”In a space known for rugs and rage-quits, this one felt different. Proof that the community in “crypto community” isn’t just a marketing term.Sometimes it’s the reason people keep going.

Cringe Chronicles: "The time I met CZ in a toilet."

You can’t make this up (but someone probably did). An anon at a major crypto conference found themselves mid-stream next to Binance CEO CZ. Words failed. Time froze. CZ allegedly nodded, zipped, and exited with boss-level efficiency.“Didn’t even wash his hands. Legend.” Is it true? Who cares. In crypto, if it’s awkward, unverifiable, and deeply memeable, it belongs in the canon.